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Full Circle

 

Tidal turns, my here and now, 
It's getting darker, 
I've been here before I think, 
Just a little further to go... 
  
Clear blue skies will slip around 
Disguising storms, both black and true, 
This time my castle's built to last 
I cannot live through its collapse 
  
There, it's over, sunshine beats down 
Upon my reality, burning, buckling, tarnishing, 
Blinding light, now searing my sight, 
White noise fills my calmed thoughts, negates. 
  
Once settled, now calm again, random doubts 
Just drift away, leaving me to play. 
Expectation now, transparent, seen past, 
I live without, it's my only way. 
  
Every moment spent in fantasy, 
Sunny, warm, cosy, happy and gay, 
My smile gleams joy in this world, 
I have to stay here, it must make sense. 
  
I shall fit the new, slowly 
Siphoning off the odd objects, misfits, 
Filtering strange and wicked desires 
Needs will be overcome. 
  
This land of my creation, 
This world of glorious fairytale, 
It's virtually real, all there is out there now. 
So I go on, and on, innocently, confidently 
  
Blissfully unaware of utter truth 
Sidestepping, losing the lies 
My shell grows to weaken. 
Power is fading, cracks invade my belief, 
  
Teasing, toying, flashing, allowing the rain in. 
At first, no more damage than can be patched, 
But crack finds crack, gaping holes exposing more, 
The flood then starts, it is time for war! 
  
With all that is me, well the me I made, 
Defending against knowledge, 
Insidiously tracking each new scaffold, I build 
Becoming weak, cold, inadequate, bleeding my soul 
  
The Battle now, will soon be done 
And from my dreams I will rudely be awoken 
My sorry eyes upon ugly truth must rest, 
This land of mine tied in confusion, 
  
Rotten, and beyond quick replacement. 
How do I find my way out? This is my place! 
Was I too clever, hiding the exits from even myself, 
Not able to trust in all that I was. 
  
I've burnt my bridges, tampered with signs, 
The sunshine coast, now contaminated, overgrown 
A jungle cries from deep within the storm, 
Hey, I'm not suprised! I've seen this before! 
  
Danger lurking, strangers, stranglers round every turn, 
Fierce creatures, creeping through my naked flesh, 
Tearing, laughing, ripping my worlds apart. 
Unconcerned, that I am alone now, 
  
My creation has turned against me! Justice? 
"You fool", I hear, 
"Look what you've done!" 
Yes it's time, to build another one! 

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